You are not healthier than me so stfu!

Ever since I threw myself into this health and fitness world I have been overwhelmed with the amount of information and opinions on how to lose weight, gain muscle and overall be healthy.  Then I decided to stop listening to other people and do what my coach says. Shit, I pay her enough to do the thinking for me why would I not listen to her?  But lately it seems like as I get closer to the show more opinions are starting to surface and it is quite freaking annoying.

Let’s get one thing out of the way…do I believe that the diet, supplements and meal plan is the best way to get in shape or even competition ready?  No, but if I did it my way, the way that has been failing me for years, I would still be a little buffless baby.  My long-term goal is to live a life with muscles and good health that is accomplish naturally.  A lot goes into this prep that I don’t consider natural or necessarily agree with, but I know nothing about my body, nutrition or this sport.  So right now I am doing it the way it has always been done, the way that has been successful for many people and when I learn more about everything I will try to reinvent the wheel and do it my way naturally.

With that said I am so sick of hearing people protest and argue on what is considered “healthy”.  You google any topic on health and you will find numerous articles that are for and against it; it is never ending.

Being plant-based is the best. No animal protein is the best.

No, we shouldn’t be consuming other animal milk, but wait..we need calcium.

Whey? Soy? Soy is bad, but no, soy is good?

Dairy is bad. Meat is bad. Fish is bad, but some times good.

Good god, shut the hell up!


Gluten -free? What the hell is gluten and why are we freeing it?

I just can’t keep up!

The problem isn’t that there is one best diet, the problem is that everything we have grown up with is so processed that science is finally catching up to these allergies and diseases. So shut the hell up about other people’s damn diet and just do what is best for you and what your body needs.  Stop preaching about “x” and other cancer causing foods.  Please tell me, what doesn’t cause cancer?

What kills me is people get stuck one issue. They will parade around about how soy is bad because it is linked to breast cancer and criticize you for it for even considering it in your coffee. Um sweetie, what happened to smoking, alcohol, or better yet how about using a tanning bed or not wearing sun screen every single day? How about the Advil you take to relieve pain?  You don’t think that has long term side effects? What about all the chemicals you rub all over your body; lotion, nail polish, make up, spray tans, deodorant, shampoos, conditioner…etc.  Our skin is the largest organ and it absorbs so much so get over your soy or the one health fact you think you are educated on.  If you want to limit certain things in your diet, please do; I applaud you for even taking that step. But being stuck on one issue does not make you healthier than anyone else when you still douse yourself in toxicity daily which increases risk of any serious health issue. Plus, how much you want to bet that your one green smoothie in the morning will only last a few weeks?

What is the point of this rant? My point is to just shut the F up. If one day we wake up and eating elephant poop is scientifically proven to enlarge a man’s penis by 2 inches and 80% of our male population start buying elephants, freakin’ let them.  Do what makes you feel good about being healthy and happy.  We are all going to die and most of us are going to get some form of cancer.

So be merry and eat your god damn elephant shit!

Santiago Out.

Good Food or Good Health?

“I’m training for a fitness competition” always seems to come up in conversation with almost anyone I talk to now a days.  Maybe I’m bragging or maybe I just have this little thing called pride to be able to go after something that many people won’t dare try.   Regardless, it has been a struggle and I would be lying if I said this process has been done 100% perfectly.  I strive every day for that 100% and sometimes I make it and some times I don’t. But in order to change you have to try right?

Some where along the conversation I always hear, “I want to be able to lose ___lbs, but I don’t want to get on some crazy diet or have to stop eating ___.”  First of all, you can still look better and enjoy your naughty foods, but what these people are saying is they don’t want to give up naughty foods for more than a day and I completely understand.  But at some point you have to think about what you want more – fit body or naughty food?

Here is the thing we all want to have our cake and eat it too, but that cannot happen with fitness.  You don’t need to prep for a competition but if you want to change your body you have to change your habits.  If you don’t want to change your habits then your body remains the same. Trust me, I know; It is a struggle I deal with daily.  You would think after all this training I would have it by now but I still fight my old habits.

You can’t say you want to lose 20 lbs without going to the gym and eating pizza.  You definitely can’t say you want to tone up but don’t want to have to live without your daily take out or frozen meals.  And blaming time for your lack of motivation to change your life doesn’t work because when will time every free up to be a better you?

You need to decide what is most important;  How you are going to feel with a life long 6 pack? Or how you are going to feel after you finish your 6 pack of beer?  Whatever choice you make is fine but you cannot have both.  And the sooner you accept it the least irritated I’ll be in having a diet discussion with you. So figure it out.



What to do after a binge


Whether you are on a diet to do a fitness competition or you just want to look cute in a bikini this summer, cheating is something we all do.  We are human and food is delicious.  True, the only way to get to your goal is practicing self-control but mishaps will happen and it is important to learn from it and get back on track.  If you are like me, an emotional eater, these “cheats” can easily turn into a binge that you will forever regret.  My regrettable binges usually consist of lots and lots of carbs which is probably paired up with a massive amount of sodium and let’s not forget the fat.

So here is the deal  – If you have a fantastic carb binge, your blood sugar will spike and if your carb binge is paired with fat (who binges fat free?) it can lead to weight gain.  But don’t freak out, if it is one time binge and you continue your diet and work out you should be in the clear.  It’s when the binges happen multiple times throughout the week. Now if you have protein with your carbs, your blood sugar won’t spike as high making it harder to store fat. Keep in mind calories in and calories out is what will shed the weight. So having a shit load of protein with your binge and not actually burning enough calories won’t do shit.

This carb binge will leave you visibly and uncomfortably bloated which will probably last a couple of days and you’ll have a butt load of energy to burn.  Most people, particular women, think the only way for damage control is to starve themselves for the next day or two.  That doesn’t help you in any way but create more damage.  Your body isn’t stupid. If you don’t feed it, it won’t let go of fat which is your ultimate goal.  You have all these extra calories aka energy so get your ass off the couch and burn it and keep eating!  Eat clean and every 2.5-3 hours to keep your metabolism moving to burn the stored fat.  

Regardless you probably feel like shit; pissed at yourself because you “should have known better” and now your stomach hurts.  I know, I know, you suck at life.  You should just go cry in the closet gripping your chunky monkey.  Been there, done that, rinse and repeat.

Before you follow in my old footsteps, here some tricks I’ve researched and followed:
  1.   Drink lots of water. The water helps get rid of toxins and water retention from the shitload of sodium you ingested the day before.
  2. Exercise. Remember you just consumed a lot of calories (energy) that need to be burned. Plus, the sweating helps release toxins and extra sodium. I will usually go harder on my cardio session that day but I don’tleave out my lifting. 
  3.  Keep eating and following your diet.  Don’t skip breakfast and don’t skim on calories.  You could lighten up on the carbs and use what you still have, but just keep moving on. You are still going to look and feel bloated for a few days but it is temporary so don’t freak.    
  4. This is where the therapy comes in – learn from it. Write down your triggers and recognize the feelings that prompt you to binge in the first place. I know that no matter how much food I ate, the feelings I had before the food never went away when I was done stuffing my face.

Most importantly don’t give up. So you screwed up. Woopdifreakindo!  You exposed a weakness that you need to strengthen and it doesn’t mean your goals are completely out of sight.  Stay positive, practice good habits and be persistent.

“Strength does not come from winning. Your struggles develop your strengths. When you go through hardships and decide not to surrender, that is strength” 


-Arnold Schwarzenegger   
Today I feel like shit, the kind of shit that happens after a late night run at taco bell.  It is day 4 working on my coach’s plan and it’s not necessarily hard but it certainly isn’t a walk it the park.  My diet is stricter, less carbs; no dairy, MORE chicken…the chicken is tough to handle especially at 10am. That requires a lot of self talk to finish that meal. Overall, the whole diet is not that bad. I guess I am getting use to eating like this.
 I love my work out plan. The new cardio is challenging but keeps my ass sore for days and I can feel my muscles actually working during my weighted exercises.  And I love, love, LOVE my Isagenix supplements. So overall everything is good and I am really taking a loving to the gym.
But I still feel like shit. I’m tired, so tired and my head is throbbing. My neck is stiff as hell which usually happens from stress.  Usually by the time Wednesday comes around I am burnt out and ready to call it a week. I don’t know if I am over training or if I am over working or maybe a combination of both. Trying to keep some mental peace and clarity at my job is difficult at times and fighting to tame my crazy can be quiet exhausting.  But with everything I have been learning and applying through out this experience I am hopeful that this will all come to an end. It is a matter of training brain to make positive changes, not just go through the motions.
On a positive note, while I was working on my biceps last night I noticed veins popping out my hands and fore arms and then this morning my suspicious were visually confirmed – my boobs are getting smaller. YAY for veins and smaller boobies!!

Grumpy does not look good on me

I am one grumpy woman.  We changed my diet plan, no biggie, right? Uh…big biggie!! I have literally had to eat every two hours and I was holding off for that 2nd hour or else I would have eaten sooner. I’ve been starving at least an hour after my meal.  It’s 5pm and I’ve already finished my 6th meal.

My Plan

Protein – 3 ounces per meal
Starches –  ¼ cup 4 times per day
Veggies – 1 cup per serving.
Fruits – 1/4 cup serving 4 times a day, all within the first four meals of the day.
Good fat –  2 tablespoons per day

So lets see what this looks like:

Meal 1:  3 ounces of protein, 1/4 cup of fruit, half cup of veggies, quarter cup of starch
Meal 2:  3 ounces of protein, 1/4 cup of fruit, 1 tablespoon good fat, half cup of veggies, quarter cup of starch
Meal 3:  3 ounces of protein, 1/4 cup of fruit, half cup of veggies, quarter cup of starch 
Meal 4: 3 ounces of protein, 1/4 cup fruit, half cup veggies, quarter cup of starch
Meal 5:  3 ounces of protein, half cup of veggies
Meal 6:  3 ounces of protein, 1 tablespoon good fat, half cup of veggies

2 scoops of Isalean = 1 protein, 1 starch, 1 fruit

I check in with my trainer this Friday and from there new adjustments will be made if needed.  But for now I hate my life. No, no, that’s negative, I hate everyone else’s life.  I’ve been drinking a lot of water to try to suppress this hunger feeling but it only works for so long and then of course you have the peeing every 30 mins. Lord,  I actually think I am going to have to lock myself in my room in about an hour or else I may do something really bad in the kitchen. I suppose locking myself in my room early isn’t a bad idea as I could probably wake up 5am like it’s no big deal.

Oh, and um, hi…can we just say I have 14 weeks till my first competition! Holy crap!


Was it worth it?

Last night my friend shamed me for cheating on my diet and out of curiosity she said, ” I always wondered, was it worth it?”

When it comes to impulse, anxiety and emotionally driven cheating, it’s never worth it.

That kind of cheating is like when you have sex with someone because “you just want to have fun” and then afterwards you feel like shit because you realize your are really longing a deeper connection than that.

A less dramatic example would be when you text/call a guy knowing he has no real interest, but all you need is some validation with some shameless flirting that you are desirable.  And even though it seems like it’s no biggie, you suddenly find yourself pissed off because he isn’t giving you the damn attention you wanted.  Hello, why would be? He isn’t really interested and you knew that. It was temporary satisfaction hoping to fulfill a long term need.

That’s what cheating is for me.  Food is an emotional band-aid. It always has been and it probably always will be.  I may be able to control the use for the “medication” as I get older and explore other ways to feel better, but I know it is something that can easily creep up if I don’t get control over my life and emotions.

So no, cheating is never worth it.  The food provides a temporary feeling of pleasure, like a drug, that helps fill a temporary void of long term fulfillment.  And of course, after an hour has gone by I am beating my character with a brick for ruining everything I have worked so hard for. 

I know you are thinking “just stop cheating, dumbass.” Gee whiz, why didn’t I think of that captain fuckin’ obvious? Rome wasn’t built in the day and neither will my self control, discipline, muscle definition or my impulsive, emotional eating habits.  But lawdy lawd, I’ve come a long way, let me tell you.  Actually, I won’t tell you.  That’s for another post that at this time I am unwilling to share.


Bad girl. Very bad girl!

I’m a bad person. I broke my diet.  I mean, I really broke my diet.

I don’t know what happened. I was doing so well this weekend.  I turned down cake, pita jungle, alcohol…I did sneak in 2 glasses of red wine and some guacamole and chips, but that’s not the cheat I’m referring too.


Delicious, fattening, crack induced, Papa John’s 6 cheese pizza with a side of Parmesan bread sticks.  :/

4 slices of pizza
2 breadsticks
…oh and a big bowl of popcorn.

I’m such a bad girl and I need to be punished….
….oh, if I only had a man…