So I would have never called myself a writer and I kind of still don’t. However, I started a blog in January to help hold me accountable for my competition goals. This blog has turned into something I never expected. Honestly, I never really thought anyone would care to read it. Anyway, I was approached by an online magazine, The Indie Chicks, about possibly writing a guest article for the mag about my experience with training. Uh, yes please!
It’s time for a little happy talk. Don’t get me wrong, I am still a nut bag mentally but I try to calm it down. I am ten weeks out today…freaking out! I am excited and nervous, confident and insecure all in one. My mom and I bought our airline ticket and I finally decided on a suit. I haven’t ordered it yet and I can’t decide if I want to share what it looks like ahead of time. But we will see, I have to get it first. Taking these steps make it more real the time is coming and I am getting more excited with each purchase made despite what my bank account says.
The other day my coach posted up some prep brownies that we could have on her Instagram. Being a brownie lover I obviously had to try and I am obsessed! Now granted, they do not taste like REAL brownies but when your diet is chicken, fish, veggies and brown rice, anything will taste like heaven. So if you are looking for a healthy treat then you should try these!
In a large bowl mix a cup of oat flour, 1/2 cup of stevia, pinch of salt (I didn’t use any salt). In another bowl, whisk 7 egg whites, 1 tbsp of vanilla extract (I found that chocolate extract added more flavor), 1/3 cup of unsweetened natural apple sauce. Whisk the wet ingredients until the egg whites become fluffy and add to the dry ingredients. Mix together and add 2 tbsp of cocoa powder. Put in a cup cake pan/flat pan for 15 mins in the oven heated to 350 degrees.
The first time I made then I didn’t crush almonds only because I had my almonds for the day. Yes, a whopping 15. Today I crushed them and added them to the brownies 5 minutes into baking. I didn’t add it on top while it was wet just because I thought the almonds would sink in, but it cook pretty fast with 5 mins so it wasn’t as wet as I need the mix to be to hold the almonds either. So that part is an experiment still.
The batch made 20 brownies – Per Brownie: 21 calories, 4 grams of carbs, .05 grams of fat, 1 gram of protein.
Supplement Talk – I think I finally settled on the supplements I like.
You can go anywhere to get this stuff but I’m a pretty loyal customer to the Vitamin Shoppe. I use the BCAA mixed with some crystal light pink lemonade and sip on that while I do my cardio. Well generally while I work out but especially during my cardio so I can prevent muscle breakdown. The BCAA Powder is a Vitamin Shoppe brand and to be honest, I haven’t tried any other else than the ON Amino Energy. It’s not to shabs but I need the little flavor to get through. I may just buy more ON Amino Energy since it has BCAA in it, but as of now I use that as my pre work out. I was using Cellucor C4 and didn’t find that it gave me the boost I needed for my work out. But the Amino Energy on the other hand….totally feel it and it taste delicious! I have the watermelon flavor and it takes like a lollipop and doesn’t have the nasty chemical shit taste most products have. For my post work out , I use BSN Cellmass 2.0 Blue Raspberry. So far so good, flavor is definitely doable. I will probably stick to it for now because it’s the best tasting one I have had.
Competition Information – Some of you guys have been asking about my show and I will continue to share this info, but might as well let you guys know now. The official flyer finally came out so here ya go!
August 10th @ Monmouth University. Prejudging $20 is at 11am and Finals $35 – $40 @ 6pm. I have no idea why it is 35-40 but if I find that out I’ll let you know.
And before I end this one more thing – my article will be posting on June 4th at 7am est at http://www.theindiechicks.com! Be on the look out for that… 🙂
I can’t help but feel insecure. I’m 11 weeks out and I’m freaking myself out. I’m retaining a lot of water which messes with my head and it’s pissing me off. I know it’s temporary but it doesn’t help me think clearly.
I look in the mirror and all I see this skinny-fat, scrawny, wannabe, that will never make it to the stage. I know, I know. You don’t need to lecture me on how ridiculous my thoughts are. I am aware that they are unrealistic, i get it.
Last week I made mistakes and this week I am back on track. However it doesn’t take away the anxiety of me wanting to starve myself and skip meals or binging and then going for a long run. I’m in my head, I know. But I can’t help it. I am having a moment.
So much is happening that I don’t know what to do with myself!
1. I deleted my personal facebook account. I made this decision because I am finding myself too distracted with things and certain individuals on da book. I’m allowing these distractions take away from my training because I can’t shut my mind off from it. So in order to stay focused I made the choice to delete the page for now. Don’t fret, I’ll get back on in August. In the mean time I created a facebook page for my blog where I will continue to add updates regarding my training. Anything I do online I want it to be goal related. With that said if you have not already “liked” the page here is the link for your liking enjoyment. Go nuts: Beauty in the Buff’s Facebook Page
2. My sister and her fiancé (so weird saying that) suggested I start vlogging. It’s actually something I have thought about and I even made a youtube channel for when I am ready try it out. My hesitations and insecurities with vlogging are basically no different than they were when I started my blog. So I am just going to have to jump right in and go nuts with it. However, it certainly wouldn’t hurt if you had any suggestions of specific topics you want to see.
3. Most exciting news of all! I have briefly mentioned that I was going to be writing an article for an online magazine. Actually maybe I haven’t…I am going to be writing an article for an online magazine! The article is based on my decision to compete and an overview of what has been happening. If the article gets a good response I will do a 6 week follow up with them and a final competition post. It will be going live on June 4th and I am nervous-excited about this. I don’t consider myself a writer and I am still shocked when people tell me they like my blog. And here I am, challenging myself in another unknown way in hopes to get good feedback. What is going on with my life? Who am I right now?
As it gets closer I will definitely update you on where you can catch my article but in the mean time be prepared for some minor freakout insecure moments. They will happen.
Despite these great things my training has sucked. I’ve been mentally suffering but slowly coming back. My motivation is low, very low. I’m just going through the motions without any purpose and it is killing me inside because I am the 12 week mark. Typically 12 weeks is when people start training and even though there are other first timers like me who started further out than that, in my head I keep thinking, “all of my competition is going hard now. No room for error!” Unfortunately this week has been error filled and it is stressing me out. I know I need to let it go, brush off the day and keep moving forward. I also know that I will be able to do that but I just needed it to happen yesterday.
Despite my mental break downs and crazy moments, I keep reminding myself that I am right where I should be. Things like this article and blog are becoming constant reminders that good things are happening so don’t give up!
I won’t. I may get a little crazy, but I won’t give up. Not this time.
I apologize for the mess of my blog right now (as if you are truly devastated) but I am going through some transitions. I’m trying to make my move from blogger to wordpress and get a snazzy little lay out. Ohhh shit, big things poppin!
So back in February I talked about being a Savage Girl and a few weeks ago I decided to stop working with them. My coach was good and they help me get started with a better work out and diet plan, but they really were not for me and I should have know going into it. This team was one of those popular teams and I felt like I needed more attention to get a better understanding with what I wanted to accomplish.
What did solidify my decision to go with Cathy Savage was the fact that they believed in the Isagenix products which are all natural. I love all natural. I have used these products before and really liked them and I don’t know why I ever stopped. Anyway, I ended it with Savage and have been on my own for about 3 weeks. I continued my training, started educating myself on any thing related to fitness and competitions and kept reading up on different trainers I could work with.